“The Gospel And Parenting”
Ephesians 6:4, 1 Corinthians 15:1-11
Sermon Series: “Modern Family”
Introduction: This is very much an application focused message. We are seeking to apply the gospel to every area of life, and parenting is certainly no exception to that. 1 Corinthians 15:3 tells us that the gospel is of first importance. Ephesians 6:4 says, “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” Simply put, “training” refers to teaching them through discipline and “admonition” refers to teaching them through verbal instruction. We will focus on admonition this week and discipline next week. The premise of this message is that we need to parent based on the gospel and communicate and embody the gospel to our children. How do we do this?
1. We are all sinners.
A. We sin because we are sinners. Nature determines conduct so our children are born to sin.
B. This means that our problems are primarily internal (instead of external), and we are responsible for our own actions.
C. It is crucial that we teach them right and wrong and the reality of every action having a consequence. This is vital preparation for trusting Jesus (the Law shows us our need for a Savior, Galatians 3:19-25).
D. This means our kids can make choices, even bad ones, so we cannot guarantee outcomes as parents.
E. While a healthy self-image is important, it is vital that we not fall for the culture’s lies about self-esteem.
F. When we model repentance to them, we are showing them the gospel.
2. Our children’s ultimate need is a relationship with Jesus.
A. Let me paraphrase something that Jesus said (Mark 8:36). How does it profit our kids if we give them everything this world has to offer and they lose their soul?
B. Our priority in prayer and actions should be to do everything we can to help them personally trust Jesus.
C. Be gospel-centered instead of moralistic (the point is not to raise “good little boys and girls”).
D. Focus on their hearts instead of external things.
E. The gospel is not something we accept but Someone we are trusting in.
3. Based on the gospel, parenting should be 100% grace and 100% truth (see John 1:14). Tim Keller says of the gospel, “The gospel is this: We are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe, yet at the very same time we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope.” Our kids need to experience this kind of accountability and acceptance from us in order to learn that is how God relates to them through Jesus.
4. Parenting is discipleship.
A. Our goal is not to impart head knowledge but for them to become like Jesus through changed hearts.
B. We must be careful to try to cooperate with the working of the Spirit of God as He develops our children into who He wants them to be instead of parenting by pride that focuses on how other people see them (and us) outwardly.
C. We are called to prepare them for their future (prepare them to get as far upstream as possible).
D. We are creating a culture that communicates what is important to them (more caught than taught, teachable moments, them actually obeying instead of just hearing truth).
E. Entrust our children into God’s hands.
F. Remember that this begins with us (we can’t give what we don’t have or lead where we have never been).
